Archive for September, 2009

Boomers as helicopter parents and grand parents

Saturday, September 26th, 2009
Helicopter parent questionnaire

Helicopter parent questionnaire

by Boomeryearbook.com

Many boomers are already parents and are bracing themselves for the challenges that come with being a grand parent. Many others are just beginning to come to terms with the immense challenges that come with living and parenting teenage children. But what really is the role and responsibility of being a parent or a grand parent? And how do you distinguish between fulfilling children’s needs and spoiling them? How do you protect your children (and grand children) without being over protective? How do you teach them right from wrong without imposing yourself self on them?

These are serious questions for today’s boomers and believe it or not, the answers to these questions lie in the ability for boomers to detach themselves from the roles of parents and grandparents. Problems arise only when these parenting roles become the sole source of identity for the baby boomer parents. In other words, the root of the problem is the baby boomer parents’ unwillingness to let go of the need to be needed by their children and grandchildren. Haven’t we seen countless 40 year olds being told by their mothers that they know what’s best for them. There is no authentic relationship because the parents seem to be drawing their sense of identity from being in control as the parental authority figure. When this controlling attitude is challenged by the adult (or even teenage) child, the parents tend to revert to playing the blame game.

On the periphery it looks as if these baby boomer parents are concerned about their children’s and grand children’s well being; but in reality it’s the parent’s ego that’s unable to let go of the controlling parental role. The ego is always in pursuit of fulfilling some overt or covert selfish motive, and this is typically the case in overly intrusive or “helicopter” parents. The antidote to these phenomena is self awareness – self awareness is that fresh ray of sunlight that has the power to banish all such ego-generated demons. If we had the luxury to listen in on a boomer parent’s covert inner dialogue, it would be as follows (such covert self-talk is so unconscious that even we ourselves aren’t aware of it):

“I want you to be what I couldn’t become”

“I will continue to love you if you do what I want”

“I sacrificed a lot for you; therefore you are not permitted to disappoint me”

“If you disobey me, I will make you feel utterly guilty until you give in to what I

want from you”

etc..

Psychological articles inform us that the key is to bring such ulterior motives out of the dungeons of the subconscious mind by being highly aware and sincere with our selves. Once these thoughts and intentions surface, we are usually amazed at how much of a grip the ego has on us. The more “past” people share with each other, the more there is a need for heightened self awareness. The reason why people find it easier to be with friends as compared to family members is because there is a greater shared “past” with family. This was well summed up by Ram Dass when he said, “if you think you are so enlightened, go and spend a week with your parents”.

Needless to say, there is a need for boomer parents and grand parents to learn to let go of parenting roles that are no longer required. When raising babies and younger children, parents need to be protector and caretaker, provider and role model. With adults, parents need to be a gentle, graceful and compassionate source of wisdom. Moving appropriately into and out of these roles is what parenting is all about.

The Psychological Article on Boomers as helicopter parents and grand parents is part of Boomer Yearbook’s continuing series of baby boomers psychological coaching tips and how to alleviate elderly problems. We believe knowledge is power. We’d love to hear what you think.

Boomer Yearbook is a Social Network and Psychological Articles for Baby Boomers. Connect with old and new friends, or expand your mind and ward off senior moments and elderly problems with dream analysis and online optical illusions and brain games provided by clinical psychologist Dr. Karen Turner. Join other Baby Boomers to stay informed, receive weekly Newsfeeds, and let your opinions be heard. Baby boomers changed the world. We’re not done yet!

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Bang Bang Baby Boomer: Time for Leisurely Sex

Saturday, September 26th, 2009
Bang Bang Baby Boomer

Bang Bang Baby Boomer



By Boomeryearbook.com

Sexual comedy can sometimes take the place of sexual satisfaction when normal people are caught up in the throes of raising a family. Families with two or more children have a pressured routine that involves children quarrelling over the play station; feeding times for babies; school runs and errands; after-school activities; packing lunches; the list is endless.

Somewhere in the havoc, parents try to make time for sexual activity in the five or ten minutes privacy they manage to achieve before their youngest appears at their bedside: “Can I sleep in your bed, Mom?”

As baby boomer parents finally achieve middle age, they breathe a sigh of relief as older kids begin to show signs of moving away to go to college and a number of other emotions take the place of being bombarded with teenage hormonal tantrums and being exhausted by family routines, while at the same time trying to answer the demands of a full time job.

Gradually, life begins to slow down dramatically as the house slowly empties of children. Men and women experience some emotional roller coasters at this stage in their lives, as children who dominated their existence for half of their lives suddenly disappear, leaving the nest empty and somewhat lonely.

The baby boomer solution to loneliness is always to seek solace in company but in fact the obvious and more satisfying solution is closer to home. This is a time when grown up kids have finally left home: before elderly problems set in, baby boomer parents can finally enjoy some quality sex in the privacy of their bedroom at any time of the day or night they choose.

Conversely, at the precise moment when multiple opportunities for uninhibited sex present themselves, the desire to perform is no longer that pressing! Baby boomer ladies with a busy family life often have an active social life. When the temptation to take on more projects crops up, as the prospect of the kids leaving home looms, women often fill their timetable without considering that their time could be better spent warming up the bed sheets.

After spending a hectic and probably over pressured fifteen years or so trying to keep track of four or five people’s social life and probably curtailing one or two sexual adventures of other members of the family, the prospect of being in the house for any reason, even sex, is sometimes just not palatable. There is no reason why frequent trips away should not be on the menu at this time of life, however, when a baby boomer might have more social freedom than at any other stage so far.

Now is the time for jumping in the car and taking off to the lake for a couple of days; having sex under the stars on the lawn; spending two hours in bed in the late afternoon instead of baking scones for the Women’s Institute; being content and enough to pursue sexual happiness while it is available. Don’t let it pass you by…!

The Psychological Article on Bang Bang Baby Boomer: Time for Leisurely Sex is part of Boomer Yearbook’s continuing series of baby boomers psychological coaching tips and how to alleviate elderly problems. We believe knowledge is power. We’d love to hear what you think.

Boomer Yearbook is a Social Network and Psychological Articles for Baby Boomers. Connect with old and new friends, or expand your mind and ward off senior moments and elderly problems with dream analysis and online optical illusions and brain games provided by clinical psychologist Dr. Karen Turner. Join other Baby Boomers to stay informed, receive weekly Newsfeeds, and let your opinions be heard. Baby boomers changed the world. We’re not done yet!

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Sex with Younger People: Boomers Bridging the Gap

Saturday, September 26th, 2009
Boomer Sex: Does Age Matter?

Boomer Sex: Does Age Matter?


By Boomeryearbook.com

As middle and older age creep up on us, the sexual habits that formed a good part of our early life suddenly present a problem, especially for people who have been bereaved and lost a partner who shared a sexual routine over many years. The sexual preferences that pleased a long term marriage partner might not necessarily satisfy a new sexual partner; they might even be distasteful.

The shock of discovering a younger partner without inhibitions, with a desire to be ravaged doggy style in the back yard dressed in fishnets, can be an education for a man now in the late stages of middle age, accustomed to sexual enjoyment with a wife now gone who habitually enjoyed the missionary position, with the lights strictly off and Mantovani gently serenading on the bedside locker.

Stepping through the time barrier can be scary for baby boomers. Being responsible for sexual liberation in the sixties does not necessarily mean all baby boomers are studs with a sexual repertoire to rival the Kama Sutra. Elderly bones and joints are sometimes a little less capable of dealing with sexual athletics and often gentle sex is preferred twice weekly rather than twice nightly.

Women who seek the company of younger men are often looking for a handsome escort, an active sexual partner and someone to dance with. Now and then women tire of being constantly in the company of men who are also baby boomers and want someone who is fit and strong enough to perform a little DIY around the house and some TLC in the bedroom.

Younger women who display a preference for older men might do so because older men popularly have more self control in bed than a younger partner. Young women who are particularly self motivated sexually will certainly appreciate an older man’s ability to wait for an orgasm until his partner has achieved satisfaction. Baby boomers were in fact more active sexually in their youth than any other generation and in the days before the HIV virus and AIDS awareness, multiple sexual partners were accepted as the norm.

Men who are baby boomers, now in middle age, might have more sexual experience to offer than a man now in his twenties could expect to gain over his lifetime. Some younger women find this sexual know-how intensely attractive.

The sexual habits of teenagers and people in their early twenties are now far more reserved than teenagers in the sixties; the risk of sexually transmitted diseases rules out the kind of experimental and unprotected sex enjoyed by many of the baby boomer generation. Perhaps this is the reason why so many younger women are happy with older men; the older man brings the slow hand of experience to the bedroom, while younger men are too excited to provide satisfaction to their partners and fare better with older women.

For people who are considering having a relationship with a younger partner but worry about the consequences, reservations are usually overcome by lust!

The Psychological Article on Sex With Younger People: Bridging the Gap is part of Boomer Yearbook’s continuing series of baby boomers psychological coaching tips and how to alleviate elderly problems. We believe knowledge is power. We’d love to hear what you think.

Boomer Yearbook is a Social Network and Psychological Articles for Baby Boomers. Connect with old and new friends, or expand your mind and ward off senior moments and elderly problems with dream analysis and online optical illusions and brain games provided by clinical psychologist Dr. Karen Turner. Join other Baby Boomers to stay informed, receive weekly Newsfeeds, and let your opinions be heard. Baby boomers changed the world. We’re not done yet!

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Sex and the Single Boomer

Saturday, September 26th, 2009
Sex and the Single Boomer

Sex and the Single Boomer


Boomeryearbook.com

Baby boomers were the pioneers of sexual freedom in the sixties; the flag bearers of free love and peace and the promoters of sexual enjoyment for everyone. Sexual confidence in abundance was the order of the day back then and most baby boomers embraced their new sexual freedom with considerable enthusiasm.

Baby boomers are now entering middle age; some are already into their sixties and seventies and sexual emancipation is no longer something shocking but rather it is rightly accepted as normal behavior for most intelligent and socially enlightened members of the community.

Later life brings emotional turmoil as friends and lovers begin to develop a frailty that is not consistent with a rampant sex life. Some baby boomers continue to enjoy a healthy sexual and emotional relationship with their chosen partners but for singles it can be a little more complicated.

Single life in middle age is somewhat different to being single in your early twenties and thirties. For men and women with financial stability following a lifetime of hard work and saving for a pension and security, there is a real risk of being exploited financially by a younger sexual partner.

People with strong family commitments and an affectionate bond with children and grandchildren can run into difficulty when trying to conduct a healthy sex life alongside traditional family values. Grandad is not supposed to have sexual feelings and if he does he is expected to keep them securely under wraps and out of sight of the kids and neighbors! Otherwise he runs the risk of being ‘labelled’.

A single existence in later life prompts a barrage of invitations from well intentioned match makers to ‘fix’ a situation that might actually be perfectly acceptable. A man or woman who has enjoyed a lifetime relationship with a wife or husband now deceased might be quite content to enjoy a single life once the pain of grief has abated sufficiently to pursue some social interaction. A determined match maker can cause havoc in the life of a happy and well balanced single baby boomer.

The social opportunities for aging boomers and elderly single people are now so varied it is impossible not to find hobbies and entertainments if one is so inclined. The days when the elderly were expected to sit quietly in the rocking chair on the porch are long gone to be replaced by club outings, fine dining, day trips, sight seeing expeditions and dancing lessons. Everyone is paid attention to; nobody is sidelined in a social scene that caters for every interest and social events are even categorized in the local papers to exactly pinpoint race, religion, age group, dietary requirements, and sexual preferences.

There is absolutely no excuse for a lonely existence for single baby boomers in later life: the social choices are wide and varied enough to cover every taste and preference, from square dancing to golf. Finding a companion to share your interests might present something more of a challenge – almost as much of a challenge as fighting to stay single!

The Psychological Article on Sex and the Single Baby Boomer is part of Boomer Yearbook’s continuing series of baby boomers psychological coaching tips and how to alleviate elderly problems. We believe knowledge is power. We’d love to hear what you think.

Boomer Yearbook is a Social Network and Psychological Articles for Baby Boomers. Connect with old and new friends, or expand your mind and ward off senior moments and elderly problems with dream analysis and online optical illusions and brain games provided by clinical psychologist Dr. Karen Turner. Join other Baby Boomers to stay informed, receive weekly Newsfeeds, and let your opinions be heard. Baby boomers changed the world. We’re not done yet!

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When Boomer has Loss of Libido -and How to Get it Back

Saturday, September 26th, 2009
Loss of Libido and how to get it back

Loss of Libido and how to get it back

Elderly Problems by Boomeryearbook.com

Loss of libido can be distressing, especially in later life when there is some prospect of being able to have some leisure time to pursue a more active sex life. To find a solution to a lack of libido, it is vital to find the cause of losing it in the first place and this will either be psychological or physical. Elderly problems will sometimes account for a loss of libido as a person might be experiencing physical disabilities such as aching joints or arthritis.

A physical problem might sometimes be easier to solve than a psychological disorder. For women who are suffering from a lack of sexual interest there might be an emotional cause such as increased stress resulting from losing the family home and having to down-size, or alcohol abuse will sometimes affect the libido. Prescription drugs such as tranquilizers taken to combat other elderly problems might also have an adverse effect on the patient’s libido, to the extent that someone might stop taking their medicine in an attempt to cure their loss of sexual appetite.

For some, losing their libido presents no hardship and they are happy to cruise along without having sex and not particularly missing it. Women are more likely to accept a loss of libido than men and tend to find other interests to replace their sexual appetite. Men tend to seek a solution more often and are more likely to be candid about the elderly problems or cause of losing their libido in the first place. For men, the solution might require professional psychological therapy combined with a prescription for Viagra to help with physical inhibition.

Women with elderly problems who wish to recover their libido might try using a sex toy such as a vibrator or cream stimulant to produce tingling and moistness before attempting sex with their partner. Sometimes this works but if the problem is psychological, professional help is nearly always the only solution.

A woman’s aversion to sex might be an adverse reaction to their partner’s increased desires and the ‘turn off’ simply a subconscious effort to limit sexual activity. It might be a more serious psychological barrier caused by traumatic events such as bereavement or divorce or the loss of a lifelong friend. The causes of loss of libido are numbered and varied and it is imperative to pinpoint the problem before a successful solution might be sought.

Occasionally, a person will sail through life without a problem but suddenly experience a drop in libido and consistently experience difficulty thereafter. The reason could be psychosexual and be dealt with by consulting a professional counselor but some patients endure months or years of misery before getting help.

When seeking professional psychological help for dealing with a loss of libido, always check the professional credentials of your chosen analyst. People with sexual difficulties are often a target for untrained opportunists to exploit indiscriminately for personal gain: the therapy they provide is unproductive and could even cause psychological harm.

The Psychological Article on Loss of Libido and How to Get it Back is part of Boomer Yearbook’s continuing series of baby boomers psychological coaching tips and how to alleviate elderly problems. We believe knowledge is power. We’d love to hear what you think.

Boomer Yearbook is a Social Network and Psychological Articles for Baby Boomers. Connect with old and new friends, or expand your mind and ward off senior moments and elderly problems with dream analysis and online optical illusions and brain games provided by clinical psychologist Dr. Karen Turner. Join other Baby Boomers to stay informed, receive weekly Newsfeeds, and let your opinions be heard. Baby boomers changed the world. We’re not done yet!

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Baby Boomers Guide to Seeking Professional Sex – Pros and Cons

Saturday, September 26th, 2009
Pros and Cons of Boomers seeking Professional Sex

Pros and Cons of Boomers seeking Professional Sex

Elderly Problems by Boomeryearbook.com

A youthful person can take an active sex life for granted. The kind of social life that is prevalent for twenties to thirties tends to provide a happy hunting ground for sexual partners.

For the same people in their fifties and sixties, however, emotional complications and lifestyle could interfere with their desire to find a sexual partner on ‘home ground’. Elderly problems can bring physical limitations to sexual performance and while an elderly man (or woman) might be willing to enjoy a certain sexual freedom with a stranger, the prospect of risking confidentiality with a partner on their doorstep is worrying and inhibiting.

The advantages of seeking professional sex are the probabilities of guaranteed physical satisfaction and the aspect of privacy; being able to separate a social life and enjoy the company of friends without the sexual complications that sometimes compromise a successful friendship with the opposite sex in later life as a result of elderly problems.

Men or women who have enjoyed long and happy partnerships and find they are unable to connect in the same way with a new sexual companion might seek professional sex as a way of dealing with sexual frustration yet still enjoying the company of a new friend socially. This arrangement can fall apart, however, as the relationship progresses and the other person begins to demand a deeper and more physical interaction.

A major drawback with a professional sexual partner is that all physical inhibitions are discouraged and although this can be a bonus of a conventional sexual relationship, transferring such sexual appetites to a new partner can be problematic; few people are able to perform to the standard of a sex professional.

Another problem is that seeking out professional sexual partners can be habit forming and sometimes result in a person wanting to have a more traditional sexual relationship with a new companion but being unable to break their habit of enjoying the anonymity of a detached physical performance.

Allowing a habit of professional sexual activity to develop can cause a number of difficulties and can have the opposite effect to the one originally intended, as a certain ‘isolation’ exists in people with elderly problems whose only sexual satisfaction comes from being in bed with a stranger.

A sexual relationship with someone who is close emotionally can be a comfort as elderly problems cause progressive disabilities. For those with a sex life conducted exclusively outside the home, sex becomes inconsistent with deep affection and therefore something sought only for physical satisfaction rather than emotional comfort.

The other practical downside of professional sex is of course the cost. The price of sexual favors is necessarily high if one is to have the security of knowing a sexual partner is free of disease and that the sexual service takes place in clean and safe surroundings. A common problem for the aging baby boomer or booming senior when seeking professional sex is the lack of freely available funds to finance it and also for people who are in a relationship, being able to spend the money without a partner knowing.

Pros and Cons of boomers seeking professional sex

Pros and Cons of boomers seeking professional sex

The Psychological Article on Seeking Professional Sex – Pros and Cons is part of Boomer Yearbook’s continuing series of baby boomers psychological coaching tips and how to alleviate elderly problems. We believe knowledge is power. We’d love to hear what you think.

Boomer Yearbook is a Social Network and Psychological Articles for Baby Boomers. Connect with old and new friends, or expand your mind and ward off senior moments and elderly problems with dream analysis and online optical illusions and brain games provided by clinical psychologist Dr. Karen Turner. Join other Baby Boomers to stay informed, receive weekly Newsfeeds, and let your opinions be heard. Baby boomers changed the world. We’re not done yet!

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A few thoughts for Boomers on dealing with death (and life)

Saturday, September 26th, 2009

byb-death-danger-dreamstime_85916651

Psychological Articles on Elderly Problems

by Boomeryearbook.com

A great mystic once said, “A man who is afraid of death will be afraid of life also, because life brings death. If you are afraid of the enemy and you close your door, the friend will also be prohibited.”

Baby boomers are plagued with a number of fears – fear of isolation, fear of not having enough money, fear of change, fear of old age and the fear of losing the lime light are just to name a few. But the root of all these fears is definitely the fear of death. All other fears seem to be just by-products of the fear of death.

The basic idea here is that even though we boomers intellectually know that we are going to die someday; very few of us truly believe it. The reason I say that is because, had we truly believed it; we would be living life very differently.

The bitter truth is that we live a sleepwalker’s existence by doing things automatically without thinking about whether it’s really essential or not – we do things and say things in certain ways just because its how we have always done it. Thinking about death breaks the shackles of this sleepwalker’s existence and forces us to think of the essentials.

The Buddhists recommend imagining a little bird on your shoulder that asks the question, “Is today the day? Am I ready and doing all that I need to do by being the person I ought to be today?” this little practice will not only eliminate the fear of death, but it will also eliminate the fear of life – somehow remembering death tends to cleanse our life by reminding us of what’s really important and freeing us from all that’s not important.

Understanding death is essential in understanding life. Embracing death equals embracing life. Leaning to die equals learning to live. This thought is summed up beautifully by the Lebanese poet, Khalil Gibran,

“You would know the secret of death. But how shall you find it unless you seek it in the heart of life? The owl whose night-bound eyes are blind unto the day cannot unveil the mystery of light. If you would indeed behold the spirit of death, open your heart wide unto the body of life. For life and death are one, even as the river and the sea are one.”

It is futile for boomers to try to trick themselves into believing that we are not going to grow old and die. Wanting to be young again simply means that one is not in awe of the wisdom that comes with being old. Instead of wanting to be young again, isn’t it a better idea to relish in the wisdom that comes with old age. After all growing old isn’t simply about white hair and wrinkly skin; it’s about a mental, emotional and spiritual transcendence of everything that’s not important – it’s about moving away from the fear of death to an understanding of life and death; and then to live a better life based on that understanding.

Positive Psychology Map

Positive Psychology Map

Remeber to practice Positive Psychology and ask yourself “Is today the day, little bird… is it today?”

The Psychological Article on A few thoughts for Boomers on dealing with death (and life) is part of Boomer Yearbook’s continuing series of baby boomers psychological coaching tips and how to alleviate elderly problems. We believe knowledge is power. We’d love to hear what you think.

Boomer Yearbook is a Social Network and Psychological Articles for Baby Boomers. Connect with old and new friends, or expand your mind and ward off senior moments and elderly problems with dream analysis and online optical illusions and brain games provided by clinical psychologist Dr. Karen Turner. Join other Baby Boomers to stay informed, receive weekly Newsfeeds, and let your opinions be heard. Baby boomers changed the world. We’re not done yet!

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Glamourous Elderly Ladies and the Dying Art of ‘Chic’

Friday, September 25th, 2009
Audrey Hepburn: "Breakfast at Tiffany's"

Audrey Hepburn: "Breakfast at Tiffany's"


by Boomeryearbook.com

Some elderly ladies, despite having elderly problems, are so beautifully groomed. Many of them, of course, learned their grooming routine in the forties and fifties when, rightly or wrongly, it was unacceptable for women to wear jeans or appear in public without a hat and a pair of gloves (winter or summer!) The idea of appearing with a hair out of place was simply ‘not done’. As time marched on, women changed their outlook and their take on appearances changed with it. The fashion trends that dictated formality in the early boomer years dropped away, but some habits die hard.

Busy mothers of today race through the house in the early morning, getting children off to school and gulping half a cup of cold coffee over a mouthful of burned toast as they stuff junior into a car seat, throw on a skirt and a sweatshirt and pile their entire lives into a seven-seater, en route to school, the mall and eventually the child minder, on their way to work. On a good day, they will have one eye on the mirror while pulling a comb through their hair in the car park, mobile held firmly to one ear.

Grandma, however, in spite of her elderly problems, spends more than an hour crimping her hair and painting her nails before selecting a matched set of accessories suitable for day wear at the social center, where she will while away a few hours before heading home for lunch. Somewhere, the standards set by Grandma became lost in the pressured, modern world of here-today-gone-tomorrow fashion and lifestyle.

One of the most endearing qualities of elderly chic is its ability to bridge time. Grandma looks as pretty today in her pink print dress and pearls and she did in 1958 and many ladies with elderly problems have conquered the ravages of time and kept their figures, enabling them to achieve an elegance that escapes many younger women.

In our modern and scheduled existence, a culture of scruffiness and ‘shabby chic’ has taken hold of young women and rendered them, to an extent, masculine in their appearance. Having messy hair and wearing grubby trainers has become, if not ideal – acceptable; especially for busy mothers. When did we let go of our standards? Was it the baby boomer years that ‘did away’ with glamour and made us ‘slobs in our time?’ It is almost too sad to consider that Grandma’s generation were the architects of the death of elegance.

The younger women in our world are, as yet, free of the elderly problems that trouble Grandma in her twilight years. However, in terms of fashion, grooming and appearance, we could all take a leaf out of her book and pay a little more attention to our hair, nails and the shine on our shoes before we set out each morning. Perhaps the white summer gloves and the straw hat are taking things a little far, though!

The Psychological Article on Glamourous Elderly Ladies and the Dying Art of Chic is part of Boomer Yearbook’s continuing series of baby boomers psychological coaching tips and how to alleviate elderly problems. We believe knowledge is power. We’d love to hear what you think.

Boomer Yearbook is a Social Network and Psychological Articles for Baby Boomers. Connect with old and new friends, or expand your mind and ward off senior moments and elderly problems with dream analysis and online optical illusions and brain games provided by clinical psychologist Dr. Karen Turner. Join other Baby Boomers to stay informed, receive weekly Newsfeeds, and let your opinions be heard. Baby boomers changed the world. We’re not done yet!

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When Your Partner is Looking like a Sex Addict

Friday, September 25th, 2009
What Psychological Articles Say about our Sex Lives

What Psychological Articles Say about our Sex Lives


Elderly Problems byBoomeryearbook.com

Putting your partner first is always the secret of a successful sex life, whether you are a teenager living on a staple diet of hormones and emotions or a veteran sex addict with years of sexual adventures, literally, under your belt. This consideration is strained, however, when one partner is more sexually active than another, as is often the case in later life, when elderly problems begin to make an appearance.

The raging of an over active libido can make a couple miserable in the bedroom over years of disharmony but might often come to a gridlock when elderly problems step in and force the less active partner to start voicing objections. Quite often the quieter of the two personalities will make allowances for the other; either giving in too often to advances they feel unequal to and ‘faking it’, or those with the more lively libido might withdraw and suppress their own over active affections to allow their partner extended periods of sexual inactivity.

It is unfortunate that while people are leading an active life, they can conquer their difficulties but as they get older they are less able to deal with the problems that result in refusing to have sex. Some couples sweep their sexual differences under the carpet and muddle through regardless. The smart ones seek professional help but some couples experiencing sexual elderly problems find third party professional help distasteful or embarrassing.

The reasons for an inactive libido might be easy to uncover and deal with if early reservations can be overcome. Those who seek help and practical therapy are often able to make a successful compromise with their partners and find their sex lives enriched as a result.

Some women find sex uninteresting once menopause has been successfully survived. An ability to produce children is for some women part and parcel of the sexual experience and without it, the excitement of intercourse disappears overnight in a hot flush! Men might be simply uninterested in sex in later life although their wives continue to jump through hoops to attract their attention and lure them into the bedroom. The problem is often not one of appetite, but of incompatibility and the dissimilarity between a man or woman and the level of their partner’s sexual performance one of poor matchmaking rather than unrequited raging lust.

Whatever the reason behind the problem, elderly problems certainly do not help in the quest for a solution and it should be understood that sexual activity is in no way inhibited by age, provided both partners are healthy. It is a fact that many elderly people are lured into unfortunate and even dangerous sexual liaisons in pursuit of physical satisfaction when they feel ‘let down’ by their partner’s disinterest. It is also a fact that when some of these elderly thrill seekers are being honest, they admit to feeling ‘pushed out’ or ‘rejected’, rather than starved sexually.

Finding a solution to such problems begins with open and honest communication between partners.

The Psychological Article on When Your Partner is Looking like a Sex Addict is part of Boomer Yearbook’s continuing series of baby boomers psychological coaching tips and how to alleviate elderly problems. We believe knowledge is power. We’d love to hear what you think.

Boomer Yearbook is a Social Network and Psychological Articles for Baby Boomers. Connect with old and new friends, or expand your mind and ward off senior moments and elderly problems with dream analysis and online optical illusions and brain games provided by clinical psychologist Dr. Karen Turner. Join other Baby Boomers to stay informed, receive weekly Newsfeeds, and let your opinions be heard. Baby boomers changed the world. We’re not done yet!

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The Power of Strong Women: Propping Up Your Man in the Bedroom

Friday, September 25th, 2009
Dear Boomer. Is your sex life normal?

Dear Boomer. Is your sex life normal?

Elderly Problems by Boomeryearbook.com

The popular belief is that men age so much more attractively than women and this, at times, is true. Women with elderly problems tend to go through middle age and the booming senior years vainly trying to turn back the clock; ironing out wrinkles with the help of endless beauty preparations and potions, looking for a miracle cure for Father Time. Men, on the other hand, annoyingly sport wrinkles the size of the Grand Canyon and look colorfully attractive; interesting; ‘lived in’.

Age lends a certain personality to good looks. Yet, time can play some cruel tricks and women who were drop dead gorgeous in youth may suddenly have a complexion like old cheese and develop bandy, or loose skinned legs. Men too can have age related physical losses including sagging pectorals, balding heads and sprouting an alarming crop of hair in the most unattractive and un-sexy places. All the physical developments that occur with age present us with new challenges to overcome both socially and in the bedroom.

At the precise moment when we find we have enough time on our hands to spend a few hours in bed in the afternoon with the object of our desire, erectile dysfunction can hit like a thunderclap and ruin the fun for both parties. The awkwardness that suddenly rears its ugly head between two people who until then enjoyed a completely uninhibited sex life without elderly problems can destroy all the passion and delight they have in each other.

For women who have spent a long career helping their man to build up a decent retirement fund and making a valuable contribution to his financial and emotional health, problems in the bedroom can be the last straw and make her unsympathetic in the extreme. Elderly problems of this kind are just the sort of glitch that can send a self respecting, intelligent and sexually healthy woman into the arms of someone quite unsuitable.

Women experiencing elderly problems with their partner that affect their sex lives should consider whether they are being entirely helpful. Any kind of behavior that displays a less than supportive attitude will render a sexual partner completely unable to overcome a problem and set recovery back weeks or months as they try to hide their inability to produce an erection. The next stage is that they will find any excuse not to have sex and from there the downward spiral continues, resulting in impotence and misery; all for the lack of a little gentle patience.

Yes, men are aggravatingly unable to cope with their male pride. Yes, they are generally over opinionated and critical of women’s sexual performance, yet display a complete shutdown when confronted with their own sexual limitations. Men are sensitive; far more so than women. If your man requires some sexual help, have the intelligence to get some advice and do whatever you have to do to help him overcome his difficulties. Find new ways to have sex that do not require erectile function and be patient.

The Psychological Article on The Power of Strong Women: Propping Up Your Man in the Bedroom is part of Boomer Yearbook’s continuing series of baby boomers psychological coaching tips and how to alleviate elderly problems. We believe knowledge is power. We’d love to hear what you think.

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